|
|
Send This Site to a Friend
Cat Humor and Jokes about Cats
What time is it when 12 cats chase a mouse?
12 after 1!
What looks like half a cat?
The other half!
What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool?
She had mittens!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot?
A carrot!
How do cats eat spaghetti?
The same as everyone else - they put it in their mouths!
What is a French cat's favorite pudding?
Chocolate mousse!
What do cat actors say on stage?
Tabby or not tabby!
What's the favorite Christmas song of tigers?
Jungle Bells!
How do you know if you cat's got a bad cold?
He has cat-arrh!
What would you call a cat that likes to dig on the beach?
Sandy Claws.
Which is the cats' all-time favorite song?
"Three Blind Mice."
What is another name for a cat's home?
scratch pad.
How do you stop a ten-pound parrot from talking too much?
Buy a twenty-pound cat!
How do you know if your cat has eaten a duckling?
She's got that down in the mouth look!
What do you get if you cross a cat and a gorilla?
An animal that puts you out a night!
What is a cat's favorite color?
Purrr-ple!
Who helped Cinderella's cat go to the ball?
Her furry godmother!
How does a cat count?
One, mew, three!
What newspapers do cats read?
The Daily Mews!
What drinks milk, meows, and has eight legs?
An octo-puss!
What is a cat's favorite party game?
Mews-ical chairs!
What did the mouse say when the cat bit his tail?
That's the end of me!
What do you do with a blue Burmese?
Try and cheer it up a bit!
What is the cat's favorite TV show?
The evening mews!
What's worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs!
How is cat food sold?
Usually purr can!
What noise does a cat make going down the highway?
Miaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow!
What do you get if cross a cat with a canary?
Shredded tweet!
What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
One means pause at the end of a clause, and the other means
claws at the end of paws!
If a cat is a flabby tabby, then what is a very small cat?
An itty bitty kitty.
What is the best award a cat can earn?
The Purr-litzer prize.
Can anything be smarter than a cat that can count?
Yes, a spelling bee!
What's the unluckiest kind of cat to have?
A catastrophe!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a tree?
A cat-a-logue!
What do you call a cat with eight legs that likes to swim?
An octopuss!
Why did the cat join the Red Cross?
Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit!
Why do people love cats?
Because they are purrrrr-fect!
What happened when the cat ate a ball of yarn?
She had mittens!
Why did the cat put the letter "M" into the fridge?
Because it turns "ice" into "mice"!
When the cat's away....?
The house smells better!
Why was the cat so small?
Because it only ate condensed milk!
Why did the cat cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off!
What works in a circus, walks a tightrope and has claws?
An acrocat!
What do you call a cat wearing shoes?
Puss in boots!
What does a cat call a bowl of mice?
A purrfect meal!
What is another way to describe a cat?
A heat seeking missile!
What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!
Why are cars longer in the evening than they are in the morning?
Because they're let out in the evening and taking in in the
morning!
How does a cat sing scales?
Do-ri-me-ow!
What do cats like best on a hot day?
Mice cream!
What do you call a cat that digs in the sand?
Sandy claws! (Santa Claus)
What do you call a cat that sucks on lemons?
A sour puss!
What does a sour puss eat?
Crab meat!
What happens when two cats want the same dish of food?
They get into a phsssssst fight!
What kind of cats purrs the best?
Purrrrr-sians!
Who was the most powerful cat in China?
Chairman Miaow!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar?
A sourpuss!
What is cleverer than a talking cat?
A spelling bee!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a canary?
A peeping tom!
What did one cat say to another?
Have you heard the mews today!
What sport do cats play?
Hairball!
What is a favorite cat tale?
The Tortoiseshell and the Hair!
What do you call a loving cat bite?
Cat nip!
What do you get when it rains cats and dogs?
Big mud poodles!
Can a cat play patty-cake?
Pawsibly!
How do you know that cats are sensitive creatures?
They never cry over spilt milk!
What do you get if you cross a cat with Father Christmas?
Santa Claws!
Why did the cat frown when she passed the hen house?
Because she heard fowl language!
There were four cats in a boat, one jumped out. How many were
left?
None. They were all copy cats!
What is white, sugary, has whiskers and floats on the sea?
A catameringue!
Why do tomcats fight?
Because they like raising a stink!
What do you say to your cat when you go out?
Have a mice day!
How do you know when your cat has been using your computer?
When your mouse has teeth marks on it!
What do baby cats wear?
Dia-purrs!
What has more lives than a cat?
A frogs- it croaks all the time!
How do you spell cat backwards?
C-A-T-B-A-C-K-W-A-R-D-S!
What's a cat's favorite dessert?
Chocolate mouse!
What does a cat call a bowlful of mice?
A purrr-fect meal!
Why is a crazy marmalade cat like a biscuit?
They are both ginger nuts!
What do you call a cat that has just eaten a whole duck?
A duck filled fatty puss!
What kind of cat should you take into the desert?
A first aid kitty!
Why do cats chase birds?
For a lark!
What do cats read in the morning?
Mewspapers!
What grade did the cat get on his test?
He got a Purrrr-fect score!
On what should you mount a statue of your cat?
A caterpillar!
How is a cat laying down like a coin?
Because he has his head on one side and his tail on the other!
What cat purrs more than any other?
Purrsians!
How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters?
C-A-T!
What do you get if cross a Tomcat with a Pekingese?
A Peking Tom!
In what kind of weather is a vet the busiest?
When it's raining cats and dogs!
What's worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs!
In which month do cats meow the least?
February- it's the shortest month.
Scientists have proven that cats have more hair on one side
then their other side. Some people believe that this is
because when cats lay on their side they need insulation
from the cold on the floor or ground.
Which side of a cat has more hair?
The Outside, of course!
Alfred Says:
You know that cats are carnivores, meaning they are meat eaters.
They don't have the ability to manufacture proteins in their liver
as dogs and humans do, thus they have to get their proteins from food.
Complete proteins come from meat sources. Incomplete proteins come
from grains. Incomplete proteins do not have all the amino acids
present required to form what we call a complete protein.
Also you will want to consider the presence of harsh chemical preservatives
that are in some foods, such as BHA, BHT, and ethoxyquin. All have been
proven to play a role in various degenerative diseases such as kidney
and liver disease, and cancer.
Now, what do you believe would be better for your precious Kitty, a food
that has a cancer causing agent, or a food that has all natural
preservatives?
Our suggestion then is to look for a kitten or cat food that has at
least 2 to 3 meat sources of proteins to every one grain source.
And to look for a food that has all natural preservatives instead of toxic
chemicals.
Our recommended dining experience for cats and kittens is:
Life's Abundance Premium Health Food For Cats
It is a 100% complete and balanced formula that is safe for your kitten,
and will supply your kitten with the nutrients it needs.
Check out Alfred's
Favorite Feline Treats Here
100% Money Back Guarantee if not satisfied
(minus shipping & tax)
See Also:
Back to All Cat Care & Kitty Fun Stuff
Find Really Cool Pet Stuff - Search This Site
|
